When do things change?

Recently Whitney has started watching Sex and the City.  And when I say watching, I mean going through seasons 1-6 straight through. I was a little surprised that I actually started liking the show, but then again it has its charms and very strong characters, something that has been missing lately.  Watching one of the episodes something popped into my head, when do guys need to stop being guys and be men?

Oh no something deep, is what you are thinking.  But seriously how are we supposed to know when to flip that switch? And how do we know when we are ready to flip that switch?  Of course with becoming married there is a part of me that is already there.  I was ready to make a commitment to stay with Whit forever.  We bought a house, we have talked about kids, that we aren't having one for a while so calm down Nia.  But I made the decision to marry Whit while I was still a guy.  I didn't know what that exactly meant.  I wasn't worried about 401(k)s, car insurance, house depreciation, or career paths.  I was more worried about where the TV was gonna go and that I was moving further away from Nebraska.  But now I feel like I am stuck between who I am and who I'm going/need to be.

I still like, OK love, playing video games. I still like to sit around and watch sports.  I still like reading swords and sorcery fantasy novels.  I want to eat a Jack's frozen pizza with some extra cheese on top.  When does that change? I know I will probably never stop playing video games or watching sports, to Whit's displeasure.  But when do I stop craving frozen pizza and want...I dunno something else?  When do I start reading something else?  Or are those things that I don't need to worry about changing?

But how do you turn a guy into a man?  Is it taking away his frozen pizza and video games?  Or are the little things that need to change?  Like my inability to actually make a strong decision.  As in what to do on the weekend here.  We have lived in Europe for 6 months and haven't left Switzerland.  To get up and get a new door on the front door until some other man had to do it.  So when do things change?  When does the switch flip?  Or are these one of those 1.1 Gigawatt power switches that need two keys to turn?  Or is a switch the wrong metaphor?  I am starting to think that this is not something that can be instantly turned on and off.

Typing this out I realize that it isn't something that is instantaneous.  So it has to start somewhere and maybe it is seeing that things really need to change.  So I have to start here, in a country where I don't understand the locals and they don't understand me.  But like I said I have to start somewhere so it might as well be now.